I'm not sure when it actually happens but one day you look at your children and you finally see signs of maturity and an adult. Don't get me wrong, I still look at my daughter and see my little girl but our daily interactions have changed so much
I remember when she was young I so loved to be around her, watch her grow and most of all tease her. I don't know how she perceived being teased by me but the fact is that it was one of my ways of trying to show love. This was pretty much how I had grown up.
Case in point...
Jess had become interested in organized baseball so we signed her up for teeball. She did her first year and the second year I actually was lucky enough to be chosen to coach her team. Tee ball in our home town was anything but ..They never hit off of a tee back then ..We pitched a soft ball to them..
I grew up loving the sport of baseball, playing and watching the redsox so it was definetly nice to have an interest to share with her. We would go out in the yard an throw the ball around and I would always tease her ..
Jessica would wind up and toss me the ball and I would yell back ..YOU THROW LIKE A GIRL!! this would almost always illict the response "I DO NOT" in and almost upset voice. I don't remember when it changed but one day we went through our routine and the resonse was different ...
But Dad ..... I am a girl ...
I knew my daughter was growing ..She was actually reasoning with me over what I had said ..
Days turn to weeks, weeks to months and months to years it is just a part of life. As she turned into her teens that little girl that was the apple of my eye and slowly become an ememy of the republic.. And we spent the better part of her teenage years fighting with each other.
It wasn't always her fault, a lot of times it was due to my own struggles with life but it was anything but the relationship we once had.. The one I had really missed ...
Recently my daughter has moved back home due to personal issues. We have been able to have a lot of conversations and she is back to the person that I missed so much . Caring and fun to be around but most of all she is reasoning with life now and trying to make better decisions for herself. I'm proud of where she has grown in her life now and how we are able to have conversations that show love and respect again ..
I'm looking forward to watching her continue to mature, better herself and watch her grow into the woman and mother I know she is able to be. Most of all I look forward to the day where she is able to watch her children mature and be proud of not only them but what she has accomplished in life...
Friday, May 26, 2006
Thursday, May 25, 2006
Sunday, May 21, 2006
B day has arrived
Well here it is .. B-day our version of D-day I guess ..LOL ..
May 21st 1985 1:08 am a 19 inch 6 lb 8 oz baby girl came into our lives. Today, like all of us is a big milestone for her as she is officially an adult and able to do whatever she wishes (IE: Have an alcoholic beverage) While I'm sure she has probably done that many times illegally this is at least legitimate.
So our plan for today is to pick Jessica up and hopefully give her that tattoo she has always wanted. Yes beleive it or not mom and dad are buying her first tattoo. The idea was for both mother and daughter to get them together and have somewhat of a special memory left. After we leave the studio we are headed to the Texas Road House for an early dinner and a drink together...
We haven't had much time with our daughter over the last few years. She spent some time living in Florida and even now pretty much spends all her time with her B.F. At times it bothers us that we feel a bit forgotten but we try and understand she is spreading her wings. Needless to say Diane and I have been REALLY looking forward to having a few hours of her time today and have been dying for it to get here.... Hopefully it will be an awesome day ...
Happy Birthday Jess ...
Mom and Dad ..
May 21st 1985 1:08 am a 19 inch 6 lb 8 oz baby girl came into our lives. Today, like all of us is a big milestone for her as she is officially an adult and able to do whatever she wishes (IE: Have an alcoholic beverage) While I'm sure she has probably done that many times illegally this is at least legitimate.
So our plan for today is to pick Jessica up and hopefully give her that tattoo she has always wanted. Yes beleive it or not mom and dad are buying her first tattoo. The idea was for both mother and daughter to get them together and have somewhat of a special memory left. After we leave the studio we are headed to the Texas Road House for an early dinner and a drink together...
We haven't had much time with our daughter over the last few years. She spent some time living in Florida and even now pretty much spends all her time with her B.F. At times it bothers us that we feel a bit forgotten but we try and understand she is spreading her wings. Needless to say Diane and I have been REALLY looking forward to having a few hours of her time today and have been dying for it to get here.... Hopefully it will be an awesome day ...
Happy Birthday Jess ...
Mom and Dad ..
Sunday, May 14, 2006
Damp days
Well today is mother's day and we are currently in our 2nd week of rain straight. The weatherman says it will slowly (VERY SLOW) start drying out this week but apparently it will remain shitty all week.
We went to do our grocery shopping this am like old people do on Sunday and a lot of the roads or washed over from the rivers,ponds,streams and marshes up here. There wasn't many ways to go without going through a mini river on the road. Apparently we have received 5" of rain in the last 24 hours with another 2-4 expected today ..I have to admit it's friggin nuts..
Jess called to take her mom to lunch and I'm sitting here listening to the rain and I'm going to transfer the Ratt behind the music to DVD in a sec. That show touched a lot of people from the JCF this week because of the Jackson/Charvel ties to the band but mainly due to "The King" Robbin Crosby. I have to admit after I watched it it stirred some pretty deep emotion ..
To say it has been a good weekend would be a load of BS but it hasn't been a bad one either. We had some family issues that affected us and some personal issues for me popped up. It isn't normally something I would mention but a very good friend of mind stepped to the plate this weekend and showed me what true friendship is all about. I would take 1 friend like that over every aquaintence I've known in my life. I won't say in this writing what it is all about other than to say it is a very deep issue for me and my buddy showed a lot of concern for my well being and made sure I'd know he'd be there for me.. (Thanks dude)
Annah's first gig with her new band (http://www.ignitor.org) was last night and she has yet to post about how it went. Several of us are so stoked for her over this new chance that we are all very proud. .. Congrat's Annah..
Em's been picked to be a highlighted artist on unsigned mp3.com (http://www.mp3unsigned.com/) again someone we are all proud of and wish her myriads of success ... You go Em...Congrats
If you have read my journal entries about my daughter I sincerly appeciate it. It was a good purge to actually put it in writing and while I touched very deeply on the story I didn't add everything.. that's something I'm keeping for us ...
Hope your weekend is going well and your staying dry ..
Latah
We went to do our grocery shopping this am like old people do on Sunday and a lot of the roads or washed over from the rivers,ponds,streams and marshes up here. There wasn't many ways to go without going through a mini river on the road. Apparently we have received 5" of rain in the last 24 hours with another 2-4 expected today ..I have to admit it's friggin nuts..
Jess called to take her mom to lunch and I'm sitting here listening to the rain and I'm going to transfer the Ratt behind the music to DVD in a sec. That show touched a lot of people from the JCF this week because of the Jackson/Charvel ties to the band but mainly due to "The King" Robbin Crosby. I have to admit after I watched it it stirred some pretty deep emotion ..
To say it has been a good weekend would be a load of BS but it hasn't been a bad one either. We had some family issues that affected us and some personal issues for me popped up. It isn't normally something I would mention but a very good friend of mind stepped to the plate this weekend and showed me what true friendship is all about. I would take 1 friend like that over every aquaintence I've known in my life. I won't say in this writing what it is all about other than to say it is a very deep issue for me and my buddy showed a lot of concern for my well being and made sure I'd know he'd be there for me.. (Thanks dude)
Annah's first gig with her new band (http://www.ignitor.org) was last night and she has yet to post about how it went. Several of us are so stoked for her over this new chance that we are all very proud. .. Congrat's Annah..
Em's been picked to be a highlighted artist on unsigned mp3.com (http://www.mp3unsigned.com/) again someone we are all proud of and wish her myriads of success ... You go Em...Congrats
If you have read my journal entries about my daughter I sincerly appeciate it. It was a good purge to actually put it in writing and while I touched very deeply on the story I didn't add everything.. that's something I'm keeping for us ...
Hope your weekend is going well and your staying dry ..
Latah
Friday, May 12, 2006
Winding Roads V
May 21st 1985 1:08 am Holy Family hospital 6lbs 8 oz 19 inches long and healthy ..
After casting my eyes into the chamber the held my daughter I had gotten a request from the nurse to go to my wife still in the delivery room. She seemed to be doing well and they were tending to the final stages of taking care of her from the delivery. The labor had gone so fast she didn't have time to remember anything and in fact had gotten an epi which never even had time to take effect.
By the time we had gotten her settled into her room it had gotten late, she was exhausted and needed some rest and I needed to tend to some things. I left the hospital that morning at 6am still uncertain about our future with the baby and on a mission. Against my wife's wishes I had gone to her job to let them know and make a phonecall to her mother and father. I vividly remember that morning my now mother in law answering the phone and I simply said Diane is at the hospital, you have a grand daughter and you have the right to go see them and I hung up the phone.
After tying up some loose ends, heading home for a shower and some quick shut eye that morning I headed back to Holy Family to see Diane and discuss some ulterior motives. When I got there my focus was on trying to get Diane to agree to take the baby instead of giving it up with the intent that if she refused I would attempt to invoke my parental right as the father and raise her myself.
We never got that far in the discussion for whatever reason that morning ...Diane easily agreed that we would try and build a family and do the best we could with the circumstances. We were definitely in this together. We started discussing what we would like our new daughter to be called and my 2 favorite Choices Were Jessica Ann or Melissa. Diane readily jumped on Jessica Ann Maynard and were now a family. The problem we hadn't planned for was the fact that the process of parental termination was already being taken care of by the State of Massachusetts in accordance with Dianes original request and what was tom come would be a nightmare.
In an odd twist in the room next door to us was my neighbor from my Moms house who had just had a baby of her own and apparently word spread quickly that baby Maynard was being put up for adoption. It was a long day that day and Dianes family did show up at the hospital, spent a bit of time with her and I did my best that day to avoid them at all costs. They didn't like me and I didn't look favorably on them back then so it was best for me to hang in the background. Later that night I bid Diane a good night and some friends took me out to celebrate the good news.
I'm not sure what time of the morning it was, but a call came from my Mom and she was not happy with me. She had finally heard we had a baby and through the next door neighbor heard the plans of it being put up for adoption. To say she was irate with me would be the understatement of the year but looking back on it now, no matter what the decision back then it was simply none of her business. I explained to her that Diane and I had decided to keep the baby and raise it.
She met me at the hospital the next morning to meet her new grandaughter and hold her for the first time. When we got upstairs I was not prepared for what was about to transpire. Because Diane had set the wheels in motion to surrender Jessica the Dept of Social services was there with the legal paperwork to take custody. I was brought into a room and told I needed to sign my parental rights away to which I refused. When I was asked why I was refusing I explained that we had decided to keep our child and that did not sit well with social services.
SS tried to discourage me from using my legal rights telling me I was not ready to handle a baby and I needed to do the best for the child. When the realized they were not getting any closer the tried a new route which was to ask for temporary custody. They tried to explain that if I signed over temporary custody it would give me time to get things in order at home to have a baby and I knew that if I signed anything ... I'd never see my daughter again ...
I’ve not always gotten on well with my Mom. She's been verbally and mentally abusive to me my whole life due to her own issues but that is another story for another time. It was what took place at that moment, that would not only floor me but is something I cannot ever take away from her. My mother stepped forward and offered to provide us with everything Jessica needed to come home, effective stopping DSS in their tracks.. And she did,
I've not always agreed with the things my mom did but that is one of the positive things that I can look back on with gratitude and pride.
DSS, would go on to make our lives miserable for the next 3 years. Every week there would be surprise visits supervised doctor’s appointments etc etc etc. They were like dealing with organized crime over 1 decision that I had the legal right to make.
I guess by now this writing is probably a bit transparent but I'll point it out anyway. May 21'st of this month will be my daughter Jessica's 21st birthday and it was a source of inspiration for detailing the way she came into this world. I haven't always been the best of fathers or parents but I've done everything I could out of love of my child to give her the best opportunity I was able. I've not always agreed with her choices and god knows we have had some horrible fights in our relationship but the one thing I can honestly say in the end is that I love my daughter with all my heart. She enriched my life and changed me in a direction that has probably saved my life many times..
Happy B'day Jess ...
Love Dad
After casting my eyes into the chamber the held my daughter I had gotten a request from the nurse to go to my wife still in the delivery room. She seemed to be doing well and they were tending to the final stages of taking care of her from the delivery. The labor had gone so fast she didn't have time to remember anything and in fact had gotten an epi which never even had time to take effect.
By the time we had gotten her settled into her room it had gotten late, she was exhausted and needed some rest and I needed to tend to some things. I left the hospital that morning at 6am still uncertain about our future with the baby and on a mission. Against my wife's wishes I had gone to her job to let them know and make a phonecall to her mother and father. I vividly remember that morning my now mother in law answering the phone and I simply said Diane is at the hospital, you have a grand daughter and you have the right to go see them and I hung up the phone.
After tying up some loose ends, heading home for a shower and some quick shut eye that morning I headed back to Holy Family to see Diane and discuss some ulterior motives. When I got there my focus was on trying to get Diane to agree to take the baby instead of giving it up with the intent that if she refused I would attempt to invoke my parental right as the father and raise her myself.
We never got that far in the discussion for whatever reason that morning ...Diane easily agreed that we would try and build a family and do the best we could with the circumstances. We were definitely in this together. We started discussing what we would like our new daughter to be called and my 2 favorite Choices Were Jessica Ann or Melissa. Diane readily jumped on Jessica Ann Maynard and were now a family. The problem we hadn't planned for was the fact that the process of parental termination was already being taken care of by the State of Massachusetts in accordance with Dianes original request and what was tom come would be a nightmare.
In an odd twist in the room next door to us was my neighbor from my Moms house who had just had a baby of her own and apparently word spread quickly that baby Maynard was being put up for adoption. It was a long day that day and Dianes family did show up at the hospital, spent a bit of time with her and I did my best that day to avoid them at all costs. They didn't like me and I didn't look favorably on them back then so it was best for me to hang in the background. Later that night I bid Diane a good night and some friends took me out to celebrate the good news.
I'm not sure what time of the morning it was, but a call came from my Mom and she was not happy with me. She had finally heard we had a baby and through the next door neighbor heard the plans of it being put up for adoption. To say she was irate with me would be the understatement of the year but looking back on it now, no matter what the decision back then it was simply none of her business. I explained to her that Diane and I had decided to keep the baby and raise it.
She met me at the hospital the next morning to meet her new grandaughter and hold her for the first time. When we got upstairs I was not prepared for what was about to transpire. Because Diane had set the wheels in motion to surrender Jessica the Dept of Social services was there with the legal paperwork to take custody. I was brought into a room and told I needed to sign my parental rights away to which I refused. When I was asked why I was refusing I explained that we had decided to keep our child and that did not sit well with social services.
SS tried to discourage me from using my legal rights telling me I was not ready to handle a baby and I needed to do the best for the child. When the realized they were not getting any closer the tried a new route which was to ask for temporary custody. They tried to explain that if I signed over temporary custody it would give me time to get things in order at home to have a baby and I knew that if I signed anything ... I'd never see my daughter again ...
I’ve not always gotten on well with my Mom. She's been verbally and mentally abusive to me my whole life due to her own issues but that is another story for another time. It was what took place at that moment, that would not only floor me but is something I cannot ever take away from her. My mother stepped forward and offered to provide us with everything Jessica needed to come home, effective stopping DSS in their tracks.. And she did,
I've not always agreed with the things my mom did but that is one of the positive things that I can look back on with gratitude and pride.
DSS, would go on to make our lives miserable for the next 3 years. Every week there would be surprise visits supervised doctor’s appointments etc etc etc. They were like dealing with organized crime over 1 decision that I had the legal right to make.
I guess by now this writing is probably a bit transparent but I'll point it out anyway. May 21'st of this month will be my daughter Jessica's 21st birthday and it was a source of inspiration for detailing the way she came into this world. I haven't always been the best of fathers or parents but I've done everything I could out of love of my child to give her the best opportunity I was able. I've not always agreed with her choices and god knows we have had some horrible fights in our relationship but the one thing I can honestly say in the end is that I love my daughter with all my heart. She enriched my life and changed me in a direction that has probably saved my life many times..
Happy B'day Jess ...
Love Dad
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
Winding Roads IV
By May of that year not much had changed with the decisions over the baby and Diane hadn’t seen her parents in close to 3 months. Being a new couple living together was certainly different for both of us and even more challenging without having a car to rely on.
The saving grace for us was the fact that while the neighborhood wasn’t the best place to be living it was quite centralized to the things we needed. . Within walking distance we all sorts of daily amenities from food and groceries to a Laundromat.
All best estimations from the doctor was to put the delivery of the baby into late June early July and without my knowing a whole lot a great deal of the arrangements had already been taken care of.
May 20th was a day pretty much like any other as we both set out to work and go about our daily routines but the funny thing would be this day wouldn’t be routine by any means. I know that sounds so cliché but it’s funny how true that would be. It was a normal busy workday nothing out of the ordinary by any means.
Later that night Diane had complained about having a slight backache at work and decided to go to bed a bit early. I think it was around 8-9pm if I remember correctly.
Close to midnight Diane had gotten some really serious back spasms and I got very concerned. I didn’t know what to do about, hell I was only 19 .. So I called my sister and while on the phone she heard Diane let out one obnoxious scream. I swear she didn’t miss a step and said I’ll be right over. I had no idea what was going on but apparently my sister did ..
When Tammy arrived she had told me we were taking Diane to the hospital and there was some concern in her voice but she never let on as to what it was. We had a bitch of a time getting Diane into the car as her pain was so bad she couldn’t easily bend.
By the time we hit the hospital everything was moving quickly. They came out put her in a wheelchair and started up towards the upper floor. The nurse that was helping told me I would have to go check her in and my sister was going to park her car. I remember saying to the nurse ,,well she isn’t due for a month so this must be false labor right? Um ..nope ..she is having the baby ..
Diane went one way and I went the other to check her in scared to death and wondering what was going on. I met up with my sister in the hall and headed up to the maternity ward and I was directed into a waiting room where a nurse would come speak with me.
Tammy helped calm me down and get me situated and needed to go call home to let her new husband know we were ok. She had no sooner walked out of the room when the most bizarre part of the story happened. A nurse walked into the room and asked if I would like to see my daughter. I remember looking around the room trying to see if there was someone else who I hadn’t noticed. It was only me ..
You’re Mr Maynard right? She asked and I nodded .. your daughter is her n the hallway if you would like to see her. To say it was a speedy delivery would most certainly be an understatement. We arrived at the Holy Family Hospital at just about midnight and the baby was born at 1:08 am on May 21st 1985. In a little more than an hour so much had taken place and I’ve heard most women have labors in the tens of hours..
The timeline had happened so quickly that I had not had time to do anything. Shortly after casting my eyes on my daughter I knew I had to try and do what was right ..I just didn’t know how …..
The saving grace for us was the fact that while the neighborhood wasn’t the best place to be living it was quite centralized to the things we needed. . Within walking distance we all sorts of daily amenities from food and groceries to a Laundromat.
All best estimations from the doctor was to put the delivery of the baby into late June early July and without my knowing a whole lot a great deal of the arrangements had already been taken care of.
May 20th was a day pretty much like any other as we both set out to work and go about our daily routines but the funny thing would be this day wouldn’t be routine by any means. I know that sounds so cliché but it’s funny how true that would be. It was a normal busy workday nothing out of the ordinary by any means.
Later that night Diane had complained about having a slight backache at work and decided to go to bed a bit early. I think it was around 8-9pm if I remember correctly.
Close to midnight Diane had gotten some really serious back spasms and I got very concerned. I didn’t know what to do about, hell I was only 19 .. So I called my sister and while on the phone she heard Diane let out one obnoxious scream. I swear she didn’t miss a step and said I’ll be right over. I had no idea what was going on but apparently my sister did ..
When Tammy arrived she had told me we were taking Diane to the hospital and there was some concern in her voice but she never let on as to what it was. We had a bitch of a time getting Diane into the car as her pain was so bad she couldn’t easily bend.
By the time we hit the hospital everything was moving quickly. They came out put her in a wheelchair and started up towards the upper floor. The nurse that was helping told me I would have to go check her in and my sister was going to park her car. I remember saying to the nurse ,,well she isn’t due for a month so this must be false labor right? Um ..nope ..she is having the baby ..
Diane went one way and I went the other to check her in scared to death and wondering what was going on. I met up with my sister in the hall and headed up to the maternity ward and I was directed into a waiting room where a nurse would come speak with me.
Tammy helped calm me down and get me situated and needed to go call home to let her new husband know we were ok. She had no sooner walked out of the room when the most bizarre part of the story happened. A nurse walked into the room and asked if I would like to see my daughter. I remember looking around the room trying to see if there was someone else who I hadn’t noticed. It was only me ..
You’re Mr Maynard right? She asked and I nodded .. your daughter is her n the hallway if you would like to see her. To say it was a speedy delivery would most certainly be an understatement. We arrived at the Holy Family Hospital at just about midnight and the baby was born at 1:08 am on May 21st 1985. In a little more than an hour so much had taken place and I’ve heard most women have labors in the tens of hours..
The timeline had happened so quickly that I had not had time to do anything. Shortly after casting my eyes on my daughter I knew I had to try and do what was right ..I just didn’t know how …..
Monday, May 08, 2006
Winding Roads III
By March we were getting settles into each others habits and routines and while it wasn’t the best of situations to be in at the age of 19, it was certainly new for the 2 of us. Looking back on it now seeing myself at that age I now understand just how young I really was in the grand plan of life.
Somewhere around the middle of March there was a knock at our door. When I questioned who was on the other end of the knock the answer was in a deep stern voice “Methuen Police”. Without hesitation I assumed it was a god friend of mine but when I opened the door I would not have been more wrong.
At this point let me say that I understand I shouldn’t have to defend myself and my character speaks volumes of who I am to those who know me. To date I have no police record, I have never been arrested or detained in any way shape or form. In 24 years I have a total of 2 moving violations and 2 warnings and those were back when I was a teenager. I have never done drugs or tried them…nope not even WEED ..
So suffice to say every time this has happened it leaves me bewildered how someone can so easily abuse the legal system as such. Mom always had a way to try an punish me emotionally and this would be no different. The police had the 2nd, (Yes 2nd) restraining order for me. I had one previously a year before when I got tossed out the first time and was living with my ½ sisters.
I’ve never placed a hand on my mom in anger and I have never ever threatened her. It’s not even on record, yet time and time again the state of Massachusetts goes on the word of the women. I can’t say I blame them but it was always without merit and done to fuck with my emotions ..no more no less. I had a police officer tell me later that they would rather give out 100 and be wrong 100 times than to no do it and be wrong. I certainly understand the logic but in today’s society a piece of paper does nothing to stop abuse and in most cases that become public.. murders ..
My relationship with my mom had always been one of control and fear by her. I can’t say I don’t love my mom because I’d be lying ..it is my mom after all. Things would come to light later in life that would make me understand a bit better albeit I still would agree or be happy about it. I grew up in a household of abuse but I never understood that or realized it until later in life. I’m now learning about the affects it has had on my life and how I’ve tried not to deal with personal problems.
My whole life has been a quest to have people around me I love but I’ve learned that it isn’t possible. At least not in my situation. I’ve dealt with abandonment from my Dad, Mom my ½ siblings etc etc. This had not only been an issue early on but it is something that I deal with today and has done incredible damage to be own well being and self worth at times. This was also a lesson I wanted to correct in being there for my unborn child but sadly I wasn’t being allowed to make that decision for myself which was a huge frustration to me.
Not many people are faced ahead of time wondering those questions that would plaque us later in life. What would my child be like at 18? Would they have a good life? Would they hate me for not fighting harder to keep them. For me the biggest thing was to defeat that fear of abandonment and have someone in my life who I could not only love and be responsible for but they would be my family unconditionally and give me a reason to go on.
I’ve tried my best to live a life of doing my best by others and for the most part I believe I have lived up to that as best as I could be. I’ve never done right by myself and the things I needed to do to be happier. I’ve recently had someone point out to me that I am a people pleaser and I guess that could be a true label .
I won’t say I’ve ever tried to commit suicide as I’ve never had the gun in my mouth but there have been a lot of times in my life where I’ve contemplated it and come close to making that more. The thing that keeps me is the fear of the unknown so I guess in that instance fear is a good thing. There were many times during those early days I felt I’d be better off but the desire to be there for my child was greater than any other negative that could have pushed me to that.
Somewhere around the middle of March there was a knock at our door. When I questioned who was on the other end of the knock the answer was in a deep stern voice “Methuen Police”. Without hesitation I assumed it was a god friend of mine but when I opened the door I would not have been more wrong.
At this point let me say that I understand I shouldn’t have to defend myself and my character speaks volumes of who I am to those who know me. To date I have no police record, I have never been arrested or detained in any way shape or form. In 24 years I have a total of 2 moving violations and 2 warnings and those were back when I was a teenager. I have never done drugs or tried them…nope not even WEED ..
So suffice to say every time this has happened it leaves me bewildered how someone can so easily abuse the legal system as such. Mom always had a way to try an punish me emotionally and this would be no different. The police had the 2nd, (Yes 2nd) restraining order for me. I had one previously a year before when I got tossed out the first time and was living with my ½ sisters.
I’ve never placed a hand on my mom in anger and I have never ever threatened her. It’s not even on record, yet time and time again the state of Massachusetts goes on the word of the women. I can’t say I blame them but it was always without merit and done to fuck with my emotions ..no more no less. I had a police officer tell me later that they would rather give out 100 and be wrong 100 times than to no do it and be wrong. I certainly understand the logic but in today’s society a piece of paper does nothing to stop abuse and in most cases that become public.. murders ..
My relationship with my mom had always been one of control and fear by her. I can’t say I don’t love my mom because I’d be lying ..it is my mom after all. Things would come to light later in life that would make me understand a bit better albeit I still would agree or be happy about it. I grew up in a household of abuse but I never understood that or realized it until later in life. I’m now learning about the affects it has had on my life and how I’ve tried not to deal with personal problems.
My whole life has been a quest to have people around me I love but I’ve learned that it isn’t possible. At least not in my situation. I’ve dealt with abandonment from my Dad, Mom my ½ siblings etc etc. This had not only been an issue early on but it is something that I deal with today and has done incredible damage to be own well being and self worth at times. This was also a lesson I wanted to correct in being there for my unborn child but sadly I wasn’t being allowed to make that decision for myself which was a huge frustration to me.
Not many people are faced ahead of time wondering those questions that would plaque us later in life. What would my child be like at 18? Would they have a good life? Would they hate me for not fighting harder to keep them. For me the biggest thing was to defeat that fear of abandonment and have someone in my life who I could not only love and be responsible for but they would be my family unconditionally and give me a reason to go on.
I’ve tried my best to live a life of doing my best by others and for the most part I believe I have lived up to that as best as I could be. I’ve never done right by myself and the things I needed to do to be happier. I’ve recently had someone point out to me that I am a people pleaser and I guess that could be a true label .
I won’t say I’ve ever tried to commit suicide as I’ve never had the gun in my mouth but there have been a lot of times in my life where I’ve contemplated it and come close to making that more. The thing that keeps me is the fear of the unknown so I guess in that instance fear is a good thing. There were many times during those early days I felt I’d be better off but the desire to be there for my child was greater than any other negative that could have pushed me to that.
Sunday, May 07, 2006
Inspiration
Where do you find inspiration? Is it in the giggles of your children?The eyes of your lover? How about that song that gets your adrenalin pumping or could it be something as simple as a sunset.
I guess it doesn't matter exactly where we find it as long as we allow it it enrich us and strive to be better or simply helps us to enjoy the day with a smile.
I had a hard time with inspiration for so many years. That isn't to say that I was never inspired by anything, certain musicians influenced me to pick up the guitar but I couldn't find it in the simplest of things.
Over the last 6-9 months I've been on my own journey in life trying to find myself and work on the things that have been suppressing that inspiration. The nice thing is I'm slowly starting to see the beauty in each day and the people that matter the most to me, for the first time in my life I'm slowly finding consistent happiness. For me that has been a sporadic thing dependent upon how busy I kept my life and buried my inner feelings down deep.
I'm working who I need to be in life now, I guess when the children are gone our inner self needs to become the focus and that it has for me. I'm truly inspired by each day and thankful for what it is starting to bring me ...
When I wake up in the morning it could be the smile of my wife looking back at me or the sound of the birds. It can be the humor of the dog chasing the cat through the house or the Redsox game on my TV. The inner creator in me is beginning to feel that in my playing guitar again for the first time in years and it is a part of my life that I've deeply missed.
Everyday I get on the web and find inspiration and here's a few that stand out for me ..
My buddy Sully...
Even in the crappiest of times the thing that always rings true is his humor and his insatiable appetite for coining the latest JCF catch phrase.
Emily..
I admire your free spirited nature and your love of your family...
Annah..
Your drive and determination to be who you are and not allowing anyone to take that away, but most of all doing it in a manner you can Be proud of and make no apologies for..
Cat ..
The fact that no matter how hard you get kicked in the ass you are determined to beat it...
Smoking Chad "Chewbacca""Ash
Another humor driven individual but most of all someone who can see through all the Bullshit to the true meanings of things.
These are just a few observations and maybe they don't mean anything to anyone else. Maybe somebody will say ..fuck yeah and agree.. who knows that is the nice part of finding inspirations in things,, it is truly yours and only yours ..
Hope all of you are able to find your inspirations everyday.....
I guess it doesn't matter exactly where we find it as long as we allow it it enrich us and strive to be better or simply helps us to enjoy the day with a smile.
I had a hard time with inspiration for so many years. That isn't to say that I was never inspired by anything, certain musicians influenced me to pick up the guitar but I couldn't find it in the simplest of things.
Over the last 6-9 months I've been on my own journey in life trying to find myself and work on the things that have been suppressing that inspiration. The nice thing is I'm slowly starting to see the beauty in each day and the people that matter the most to me, for the first time in my life I'm slowly finding consistent happiness. For me that has been a sporadic thing dependent upon how busy I kept my life and buried my inner feelings down deep.
I'm working who I need to be in life now, I guess when the children are gone our inner self needs to become the focus and that it has for me. I'm truly inspired by each day and thankful for what it is starting to bring me ...
When I wake up in the morning it could be the smile of my wife looking back at me or the sound of the birds. It can be the humor of the dog chasing the cat through the house or the Redsox game on my TV. The inner creator in me is beginning to feel that in my playing guitar again for the first time in years and it is a part of my life that I've deeply missed.
Everyday I get on the web and find inspiration and here's a few that stand out for me ..
My buddy Sully...
Even in the crappiest of times the thing that always rings true is his humor and his insatiable appetite for coining the latest JCF catch phrase.
Emily..
I admire your free spirited nature and your love of your family...
Annah..
Your drive and determination to be who you are and not allowing anyone to take that away, but most of all doing it in a manner you can Be proud of and make no apologies for..
Cat ..
The fact that no matter how hard you get kicked in the ass you are determined to beat it...
Smoking Chad "Chewbacca""Ash
Another humor driven individual but most of all someone who can see through all the Bullshit to the true meanings of things.
These are just a few observations and maybe they don't mean anything to anyone else. Maybe somebody will say ..fuck yeah and agree.. who knows that is the nice part of finding inspirations in things,, it is truly yours and only yours ..
Hope all of you are able to find your inspirations everyday.....
Thursday, May 04, 2006
Winding Roads II
I can’t honestly say being out on our own under those conditions was easy, but we always did the best we could. I grew up inner city middle class as a kid and Diane’s upbringing wasn’t much different. It was tough to grow up middle class and suddenly become poor…
We didn’t have a thing to our names, No car, furniture, towels, plates ..not a thing and worst of all we had no money to get the basics. We scraped by just to get the money for our first apartment that even the security deposit was a promise of payment.
I can’t say it was the best of situations looking back on it but the things we had going for us was the fact that we had each other and we didn’t have great home lives. I won’t discuss much of my upbringing in this writing other than to say that I still suffer the affects of it to this day.
The apartment we settled on was in a really poor section of our town and somewhere I wouldn’t feel safe walking around today. We had gotten ourselves a little 1 bedroom studio where the dining, kitchen and living room we pretty much 1 room. It wasn’t much as I stated but it was ours.
During that time I had made the assumption that Diane could be convinced to keep the baby but given the circumstance she knew she wasn’t ready to be a parent. She still had it set in her mind that the baby would be better suited to someone who could provide it with a more stabile life.
Diane was never much of a motherly type because of her own upbringing and her own bad experiences so it was a very natural decision for her to try and do the best for the baby as well as her own future. The one thing we were lucky in all the turmoil was some very dear friends of ours who very graciously helped set us up in our apartment with essentials, To this day those people hold a very special place in my heart for their generosity…
In her visits to the Doctor she had made the arrangements for the adoption process and for the state of Massachusetts to take custody upon birth. I remember nights during those months lying in bed next to her trying to convince her we were able to raise a child together but she was dead set in her decision.
The only person I had to turn too beyond a few friends was my ½ sister Tammy at that time. My dad had been married 3 times in his life and I was the product of his 2nd marriage and was raised as an only child. His 1st marriage yielded a total of 4 children before he had moved on to my mom. I can’t say we knew much about each other as we weren’t raised together but when I met my sister Tammy for a brief time we hit it off very well. Tammy was a few years older than I was and I was 17 when we finally got to know each other. She had been a mother at the age of 16 so she knew full well what I was dealing with.
We did the best we could with little support and no money ..there were days we had a hard time just being able to feed ourselves. Our only saving grace at that point was working for Burger King so we had some means of getting by however small that was….
We didn’t have a thing to our names, No car, furniture, towels, plates ..not a thing and worst of all we had no money to get the basics. We scraped by just to get the money for our first apartment that even the security deposit was a promise of payment.
I can’t say it was the best of situations looking back on it but the things we had going for us was the fact that we had each other and we didn’t have great home lives. I won’t discuss much of my upbringing in this writing other than to say that I still suffer the affects of it to this day.
The apartment we settled on was in a really poor section of our town and somewhere I wouldn’t feel safe walking around today. We had gotten ourselves a little 1 bedroom studio where the dining, kitchen and living room we pretty much 1 room. It wasn’t much as I stated but it was ours.
During that time I had made the assumption that Diane could be convinced to keep the baby but given the circumstance she knew she wasn’t ready to be a parent. She still had it set in her mind that the baby would be better suited to someone who could provide it with a more stabile life.
Diane was never much of a motherly type because of her own upbringing and her own bad experiences so it was a very natural decision for her to try and do the best for the baby as well as her own future. The one thing we were lucky in all the turmoil was some very dear friends of ours who very graciously helped set us up in our apartment with essentials, To this day those people hold a very special place in my heart for their generosity…
In her visits to the Doctor she had made the arrangements for the adoption process and for the state of Massachusetts to take custody upon birth. I remember nights during those months lying in bed next to her trying to convince her we were able to raise a child together but she was dead set in her decision.
The only person I had to turn too beyond a few friends was my ½ sister Tammy at that time. My dad had been married 3 times in his life and I was the product of his 2nd marriage and was raised as an only child. His 1st marriage yielded a total of 4 children before he had moved on to my mom. I can’t say we knew much about each other as we weren’t raised together but when I met my sister Tammy for a brief time we hit it off very well. Tammy was a few years older than I was and I was 17 when we finally got to know each other. She had been a mother at the age of 16 so she knew full well what I was dealing with.
We did the best we could with little support and no money ..there were days we had a hard time just being able to feed ourselves. Our only saving grace at that point was working for Burger King so we had some means of getting by however small that was….
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
Winding Roads
What I am about to talk about is something that is very bare, at times painful but at the least truthful and heartfelt. It will be a tiny detail of somethings in my life or mainly someone who changed me if only for a sliver of time.
Back in 1983 after graduation from high school in June I met my wife Diane. She was a cute girl but certainly has been someone who has aged and gotten more beautiful with time. I can't say it was love at first site but she definetly had an affect on me. I remember the day we met as though it was just yesterday, in fact this whole blog will be about something that feels like just yesterday to me.
In a very rough point in my life and in between jobs as a 17 year old I took a very brief job working for Burger King. During my break that first day I was invited to sit down with a little blonde spitfire as she was enjoying her cigerette. I don't remember much about the conversation beyond realizing how cute I remembered she looked back then. It would not be until November of that year that we would start dating and ultimately become steady partners on my birthday Dec 24, 1983.
During those years I had some rough personal times with my relationship with my mom as well as my own inner demons and iced the cake with the fact that I went through a very lazy period of my life in those years.
My life basically consisted of Diane and guitars during that period, my life as I was either spending time with her or playing in my band. Diane was awesome all through that time in our lives as she knew what music and playing meant to me, she never once complained about the time and let me chase my dreams like all aspiring musicians do ..
By November of that year my grandmother had passed away, my mom and I were tolerating each other at best and well,.. Diane became pregnant! Diane was 19 and I was 18 at that point in our lives and I still remember the fear that came over me as everyday passed that the reality sank in that there were changes coming in our lives one way or another.
We did our best to hide it from our families as scared as we were and tried to be there for each other in those early days, the saving grace for us was that Diane never started to show until she was 7 months along and then it was a crazy begining to our lives.
My inlaws were insistant that Diane was going to give the baby up for adoption and get rid of me. I guess looking back on that now I can't say I blame them for it they only wanted the best for their daughter but at the same time I have had a hard time of letting go of the fact that my rights and feelings were never once taken into consideration back then
When I learned Diane was with child I reflected on my own life and the fact that my dad had never been there for me, he never once showed he cared. Robert Maynard had left for California when I was 2 for a new life and to start a new family.. This would affect me profoundly not only during my life but especially during those days.
Knowing what it was like to not have a father in my life I vowed that even at the ripe old age of 19 there was no way I would ever walk in my dads footsteps. I would most certainly do what I needed to do out of responsibilty.
Somewhere around Feb of 1985 things were very chaotic in our lives. Diane had been convinced the baby was to be put up and my home life with my mom had hit a new low. I found myself out in the cold homeless, no job and a lot on my mind. I think the only thing that kept me going in those days was the love that I got from Diane..
Diane and I had agreed that with me being homeless that the best thing we could do for not only me but each other was to find an apartment and start our lives together. Dianes home life hadn't been much better as her parents had become very anti Kevin. I can't give a precise date that it happened but I can say it was a Thursday night, her family was away at a play for her sister and we cleaned out all of her belongings for our move....
It may have not been the best way to start our lives together but we were determined to be independent and each others rocks. The only thing Diane left behind that night was a note to her parents that simply read ..
Mom and Dad I've moved out and please do not attempt to contact me anymore.....
Being a parent now and dealing with what I have from my own daughter for the past few years I can only say I now understand the heartbreak that it must have given her parents that night. I've spent my own sorrow over the departure of my daughter from my life now and it was one of the worst moments my life could have been dealt ....
More to come .....
Back in 1983 after graduation from high school in June I met my wife Diane. She was a cute girl but certainly has been someone who has aged and gotten more beautiful with time. I can't say it was love at first site but she definetly had an affect on me. I remember the day we met as though it was just yesterday, in fact this whole blog will be about something that feels like just yesterday to me.
In a very rough point in my life and in between jobs as a 17 year old I took a very brief job working for Burger King. During my break that first day I was invited to sit down with a little blonde spitfire as she was enjoying her cigerette. I don't remember much about the conversation beyond realizing how cute I remembered she looked back then. It would not be until November of that year that we would start dating and ultimately become steady partners on my birthday Dec 24, 1983.
During those years I had some rough personal times with my relationship with my mom as well as my own inner demons and iced the cake with the fact that I went through a very lazy period of my life in those years.
My life basically consisted of Diane and guitars during that period, my life as I was either spending time with her or playing in my band. Diane was awesome all through that time in our lives as she knew what music and playing meant to me, she never once complained about the time and let me chase my dreams like all aspiring musicians do ..
By November of that year my grandmother had passed away, my mom and I were tolerating each other at best and well,.. Diane became pregnant! Diane was 19 and I was 18 at that point in our lives and I still remember the fear that came over me as everyday passed that the reality sank in that there were changes coming in our lives one way or another.
We did our best to hide it from our families as scared as we were and tried to be there for each other in those early days, the saving grace for us was that Diane never started to show until she was 7 months along and then it was a crazy begining to our lives.
My inlaws were insistant that Diane was going to give the baby up for adoption and get rid of me. I guess looking back on that now I can't say I blame them for it they only wanted the best for their daughter but at the same time I have had a hard time of letting go of the fact that my rights and feelings were never once taken into consideration back then
When I learned Diane was with child I reflected on my own life and the fact that my dad had never been there for me, he never once showed he cared. Robert Maynard had left for California when I was 2 for a new life and to start a new family.. This would affect me profoundly not only during my life but especially during those days.
Knowing what it was like to not have a father in my life I vowed that even at the ripe old age of 19 there was no way I would ever walk in my dads footsteps. I would most certainly do what I needed to do out of responsibilty.
Somewhere around Feb of 1985 things were very chaotic in our lives. Diane had been convinced the baby was to be put up and my home life with my mom had hit a new low. I found myself out in the cold homeless, no job and a lot on my mind. I think the only thing that kept me going in those days was the love that I got from Diane..
Diane and I had agreed that with me being homeless that the best thing we could do for not only me but each other was to find an apartment and start our lives together. Dianes home life hadn't been much better as her parents had become very anti Kevin. I can't give a precise date that it happened but I can say it was a Thursday night, her family was away at a play for her sister and we cleaned out all of her belongings for our move....
It may have not been the best way to start our lives together but we were determined to be independent and each others rocks. The only thing Diane left behind that night was a note to her parents that simply read ..
Mom and Dad I've moved out and please do not attempt to contact me anymore.....
Being a parent now and dealing with what I have from my own daughter for the past few years I can only say I now understand the heartbreak that it must have given her parents that night. I've spent my own sorrow over the departure of my daughter from my life now and it was one of the worst moments my life could have been dealt ....
More to come .....
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
A day without immigrants
Well the rally came and went and I would have to assume it was all relative to where you are in the good ole US of A as to whether or not you were affected by the work stoppage. Here in New Hampshire I didn't notice any changes, nothing closed, the world kept turning... ho hum .
I certainly hope you guys accomplished what you wanted because all in all it appears the only thing you have done was pushed the legal citizens further in the opposite direction. My favorite saying as of late has been the old "more flies with honey" analogy.. I guess that would apply here too huh .. I mean it is easier to sympathize with someone who asks nicely and earns something than it is to someone who demands it ...
How do we raise our kids? Do we teach them that the temper tantrum in the store gets them the candy or the toy they were trying so hard to extort from us? Or do we teach them that hard work and perseverance go a long way in this life.... I guess this newfound attitude teaches our children an awesome lesson ..if someone doesn't want to give you something just boycott!!
I read recently the reason these people are here is to do the jobs that American workers refuse to do. Is it that Americans refuse to do them or is it just that in chasing the American dream they just can't afford to live on what business is willing to pay an illegal to do the same job. What is the poverty level in this country?T he poverty level in this country for a family of 4 is approx $20,000 a year can you afford to live a healthy life on that kind of money?
What we end up with is a viscous circle that feeds the issue of Illegal immigrants in the USA/ A good start to the problem is to force business to either require all workers to be here legally on a work visa, green card etc or force those businesses to comply with an immigrant tax that would fund the loss of revenue caused by these people.
Thinking there is no harm to being here illegally is absolute bullshit to put it mildly. Everyday millions of Americans are bound to social laws and any infraction against said laws requires some form of retribution. Why is it that we as legal Americans are held accountable while someone who is here breaking our countries laws is held in higher regard. What possible damage could being here illegally possibly do?
It taxes our school systems, health care, human services. It drive wages down so that certain types of jobs are unable to compete with the poverty level. A good amount of that non taxed income is sent to their own mother countries to support families left behind. I heard a figure quoted on Bazillion immigrants sending money home and the dollar amount given was $750 million .... hear that MILLION! that is money that will never be put back into OUR own economy. That is just the damage done by 1 specific race of people.. I can't begin to imagine what the total loss of revenues are...
There are good reasons for laws such as immigration and naturalization and I only wish they were applied evenly and fairly so not only new people coming to our country can get a fair shake but we as American Natural Citizens get a fair shake..
Anyway we have removed one day from the calender .. next up is Cinco DeMayo... Margaritas anyone?
I'm out for now...
I certainly hope you guys accomplished what you wanted because all in all it appears the only thing you have done was pushed the legal citizens further in the opposite direction. My favorite saying as of late has been the old "more flies with honey" analogy.. I guess that would apply here too huh .. I mean it is easier to sympathize with someone who asks nicely and earns something than it is to someone who demands it ...
How do we raise our kids? Do we teach them that the temper tantrum in the store gets them the candy or the toy they were trying so hard to extort from us? Or do we teach them that hard work and perseverance go a long way in this life.... I guess this newfound attitude teaches our children an awesome lesson ..if someone doesn't want to give you something just boycott!!
I read recently the reason these people are here is to do the jobs that American workers refuse to do. Is it that Americans refuse to do them or is it just that in chasing the American dream they just can't afford to live on what business is willing to pay an illegal to do the same job. What is the poverty level in this country?T he poverty level in this country for a family of 4 is approx $20,000 a year can you afford to live a healthy life on that kind of money?
What we end up with is a viscous circle that feeds the issue of Illegal immigrants in the USA/ A good start to the problem is to force business to either require all workers to be here legally on a work visa, green card etc or force those businesses to comply with an immigrant tax that would fund the loss of revenue caused by these people.
Thinking there is no harm to being here illegally is absolute bullshit to put it mildly. Everyday millions of Americans are bound to social laws and any infraction against said laws requires some form of retribution. Why is it that we as legal Americans are held accountable while someone who is here breaking our countries laws is held in higher regard. What possible damage could being here illegally possibly do?
It taxes our school systems, health care, human services. It drive wages down so that certain types of jobs are unable to compete with the poverty level. A good amount of that non taxed income is sent to their own mother countries to support families left behind. I heard a figure quoted on Bazillion immigrants sending money home and the dollar amount given was $750 million .... hear that MILLION! that is money that will never be put back into OUR own economy. That is just the damage done by 1 specific race of people.. I can't begin to imagine what the total loss of revenues are...
There are good reasons for laws such as immigration and naturalization and I only wish they were applied evenly and fairly so not only new people coming to our country can get a fair shake but we as American Natural Citizens get a fair shake..
Anyway we have removed one day from the calender .. next up is Cinco DeMayo... Margaritas anyone?
I'm out for now...
Saturday, April 29, 2006
Should liberty and freedom be a guaranteed right?
The last few weeks have been a bit trying for me and that of my moral beliefs. At every turn in the media I am being bombarded with news of how much our country sucks because of foreign policy and yet, all the foreigners was automatic citizenship.
I firmly believe we all have the right to be equal and free being able to pursue a better life but now I have to ask at what cost?
Monday will mark a cornerstone point in our nation where all illegal immigrants are encouraged to ditch work and rally to grind the nation to a halt. I have to ask the simple question.. If you want to be American so badly then why try and do something to destroy its economy for a day. Wouldn't it simply be better to peacefully assemble over a weekend or a holiday and show some pride in the USA?
I've seen people rally with the Mexican flag flying over an upsidedown AMERICAN flag. I've heard our Star Spangled Banner has been rewritten and recorded in Spanish with dnewer lyrics. All of these things point to a group of people trying to divide a current nation and start a new one and that is not the american way..
My heart bleeds for all immigrants who came for a better life and worked their asses off to become American the right way. They worked, learned English and learned the HISTORY of how we became such a great nation..
Freedom is not a sense of entiltement as we see before us today but something to be earned, worked to preserve and most of all cherished. I have grown up a citizen of this country from birthright as my ancestors have since the early 1600's so I feel I've earned my right as an American to be pissed off about this.
I challenge any person to walk into a neighbors home sit down and start making demands of your host. Illegals are no different here..You have broken into our home and decided to make demands you have no right to and have not done anything to earn .. least of all our respect.
There is a reason they are called Illegal Aliens. Because they came here Illegal and broke the current laws of immigration. They took jobs and didn't pay one once of tax they everyone of our LEGAL citizens pay. They want free healthcare, education and social benefits which are all things my family and I have worked for generations to support...and they demand it .. now they say theword Illegal immigrant is racist. ... Since when ....
I have a great idea ..instant citizenship to any immigrant who joins our military and proves to us that they want to be here and are willing to sacrifice for the american dream. The way it currently stands I can assure you that if we went to conflict with any one of these peoples countries they would not stand up for the usa ..they would fight for their own soil ...
My mother in law is of British national origin and to this day remains that way. She came to our country on a work visa and ended up getting married. The one difference I see in her as an alien of our nation is that she cherishes what we have and she respects it. To this day when our national anthem plays she stands and faces the flag with pride... She doesn't demand we play god save the queen .. That is what respect and love of our country is all about....
Sorry for the rant..but I'm tired of being taken advantage of ...
I firmly believe we all have the right to be equal and free being able to pursue a better life but now I have to ask at what cost?
Monday will mark a cornerstone point in our nation where all illegal immigrants are encouraged to ditch work and rally to grind the nation to a halt. I have to ask the simple question.. If you want to be American so badly then why try and do something to destroy its economy for a day. Wouldn't it simply be better to peacefully assemble over a weekend or a holiday and show some pride in the USA?
I've seen people rally with the Mexican flag flying over an upsidedown AMERICAN flag. I've heard our Star Spangled Banner has been rewritten and recorded in Spanish with dnewer lyrics. All of these things point to a group of people trying to divide a current nation and start a new one and that is not the american way..
My heart bleeds for all immigrants who came for a better life and worked their asses off to become American the right way. They worked, learned English and learned the HISTORY of how we became such a great nation..
Freedom is not a sense of entiltement as we see before us today but something to be earned, worked to preserve and most of all cherished. I have grown up a citizen of this country from birthright as my ancestors have since the early 1600's so I feel I've earned my right as an American to be pissed off about this.
I challenge any person to walk into a neighbors home sit down and start making demands of your host. Illegals are no different here..You have broken into our home and decided to make demands you have no right to and have not done anything to earn .. least of all our respect.
There is a reason they are called Illegal Aliens. Because they came here Illegal and broke the current laws of immigration. They took jobs and didn't pay one once of tax they everyone of our LEGAL citizens pay. They want free healthcare, education and social benefits which are all things my family and I have worked for generations to support...and they demand it .. now they say theword Illegal immigrant is racist. ... Since when ....
I have a great idea ..instant citizenship to any immigrant who joins our military and proves to us that they want to be here and are willing to sacrifice for the american dream. The way it currently stands I can assure you that if we went to conflict with any one of these peoples countries they would not stand up for the usa ..they would fight for their own soil ...
My mother in law is of British national origin and to this day remains that way. She came to our country on a work visa and ended up getting married. The one difference I see in her as an alien of our nation is that she cherishes what we have and she respects it. To this day when our national anthem plays she stands and faces the flag with pride... She doesn't demand we play god save the queen .. That is what respect and love of our country is all about....
Sorry for the rant..but I'm tired of being taken advantage of ...
Friday, April 21, 2006
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
Blogging
In all my travels across the net one of my favorite past times has certainly become reading peoples blogs. It has opened up a new medium into learning things about people who we would not normally have access too. It has allowed me to meet people with similar interests,passions and stories as mine. It has helped open up my eyes to more diverse views than my own and created some great friendships.
Blogging is in no way a good means to hide out from the rest of the world but it certainly makes it easier to vent your frustrations at the world in a non-violent way. In some instances it has become a warning sign for those who DO have violent tendencies and unfortunately for society, not always caught in time .. For instance recently a young man killed and mutilated a young girl with the intent of cannibalizing her.
Think about how many times we see neighbors, friends or co-workers on the evening news in shock stating that they would have never imagined he could do something like this. In the case of Bruce Schwartz all the signs were there.. Right in his blog!! Yet he still fell between the cracks and a young girl paid dearly for it with her life. In Boston recently a man committed suicide on a bus as the police approached to arrest him on suspicion of murder. Seems he combed the internet looking for sex offenders to kill and did so before taking his own life all by using the sex offender registry to target his victims. While I have no remorse for the sex offender I do have to admit it is a shame when something designed to keep us informed is used in such a poor manner .. Why? It affects all the people who really need to know that information ...
In the case of my blog I usually use it to be creative or vent but in a lot of cases I keep the real personal stuff to myself. Not because it is bad or could get me in trouble but like all human beings I have my fair share of scars to bear and I guess I have my own fears of how others could perceive me. In fact my own daughter reads this blog so where do you draw the line on personal thoughts and saying things that could possibly hurt others. So you walk a fine line and blog about the things that matter a little less or maybe just annoy us all while keeping the harder stuff to ourselves... In essence I am only emotionally naked to a very very short list of people...
When I visit my peers sites I most certainly see everything from creativity to venting about everyday issues. I'd love to let them all know that I admire them tremendously for allowing their personalities to shine through with little obstruction. In doing so I've learned more and more that in the end we all bleed red, we all want to be loved, give love and just be the best we can ...................
Kev
Blogging is in no way a good means to hide out from the rest of the world but it certainly makes it easier to vent your frustrations at the world in a non-violent way. In some instances it has become a warning sign for those who DO have violent tendencies and unfortunately for society, not always caught in time .. For instance recently a young man killed and mutilated a young girl with the intent of cannibalizing her.
Think about how many times we see neighbors, friends or co-workers on the evening news in shock stating that they would have never imagined he could do something like this. In the case of Bruce Schwartz all the signs were there.. Right in his blog!! Yet he still fell between the cracks and a young girl paid dearly for it with her life. In Boston recently a man committed suicide on a bus as the police approached to arrest him on suspicion of murder. Seems he combed the internet looking for sex offenders to kill and did so before taking his own life all by using the sex offender registry to target his victims. While I have no remorse for the sex offender I do have to admit it is a shame when something designed to keep us informed is used in such a poor manner .. Why? It affects all the people who really need to know that information ...
In the case of my blog I usually use it to be creative or vent but in a lot of cases I keep the real personal stuff to myself. Not because it is bad or could get me in trouble but like all human beings I have my fair share of scars to bear and I guess I have my own fears of how others could perceive me. In fact my own daughter reads this blog so where do you draw the line on personal thoughts and saying things that could possibly hurt others. So you walk a fine line and blog about the things that matter a little less or maybe just annoy us all while keeping the harder stuff to ourselves... In essence I am only emotionally naked to a very very short list of people...
When I visit my peers sites I most certainly see everything from creativity to venting about everyday issues. I'd love to let them all know that I admire them tremendously for allowing their personalities to shine through with little obstruction. In doing so I've learned more and more that in the end we all bleed red, we all want to be loved, give love and just be the best we can ...................
Kev
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
Guitars, Music and Me
People who know me are aware I play guitar and run an online BB fan site for them. What they probably do not know is the history of what got me to where I am (Not that there is much to tell)
My earliest memories of getting interested in pop music was around 1972 or so and mostly by A.M. radio. I remember hits like"Billy don't be a hero" Cats in the Cradle" when they were new music. It was around this time I actually bought my first cassette tape and probably what I consider to be my earliest influence into being musically driven. That artist was Jim Croce and I got it because of the song "Bad bad Leroy Brown". I must have been around 7 years of age at the time but his music even to this day really sticks with me.
In 1975 around the age of 9 my mother decided that "WE" were going to take organ lessons. I took to the keyboards with relative ease and I guess to some extent enjoyed it but it would become the foundation for my love of music and the desire to play. By 1976 I was getting pretty good at the keys and would get chosen to do public recitals for the store that we got our lessons from.. I loved the idea of playing in front of people even at that age...
At the age of 10 it is tough to get a child to do anything and I supposed to some extent I was no different. My mom would regularly have to push me to get my practice time in and I've since come to learn that if it needs to be pushed then it isn't enjoyed. Mom had started taking to secretly taping my practice time and playing it back to show me what needed to be improved upon ..it was this act that would push me clear of music for the next yr and a half....
Late in Oct 1976 a friend and I were hanging at my house watching a show on TV called the Paul Lynde Special and it wouldn't become apparent how much of an affect that show would have on me for quite some time. The show was based around a holiday Halloween special and had various skits and characters from other shows but the one thing that kicked my ass that night was my introduction to Rock and Roll.
Kiss debuted live on that show that evening in support of the Destroyer album, I was immediately blown away by the intensity of the music and the visual aspects of the band. While it wasn't right away this influenced me in a musical sense it certainly started me off as a fan. By 1977/78 Kiss had released Alive 2 and it was that album that finally pulled me into the guitar world. For Christmas that year I received my "Memphis" Strat and an Amp, I was well on my way!!
Dealing with keyboard lessons for close to 2 years gave me an idea of what I was in for or at least so I thought in taking guitar lessons. The thing I had not counted on was having to build up callouses and the pain endured learning to play. For whatever reason I was not introduced into "light" gage strings and I have to admit there were many times where it wasn't a pleasant experience.
I took all of 6 lessons that year and learned that I was terribly bored after all when are we gonna get to the good stuff...Rock and Roll .. not the fundamentals of site reading dammit... I messed with the guitar on and off with my own familiarity for a few years and finally Rhoads came into the picture.. Again I was blown away by the intensity of the music and the playing.. His playing would have a huge impact on me in years to come.
By the time I was 17 with 6 lessons under my belt and a whole lot of learning on my own I was playing locally with friends I had made in high school I'd have to say that jamming with other people, learning songs and specifically "Guitar for the practicing musician" were the things that had the biggest impact on my playing level. I had always been lucky enough even to this day to have a natural ability to play the guitar but the biggest lesson I can hand to anyone who wants to get better is to go play with people. Play with people who are better than you.. you will most certainly feel intimidated and out gunned..but the one thing that gave me was drive and knowledge.
By jamming with people above my level it gave me the chance to see more established people play and learn from it. It helped me evolve and challenge my limits.. All on 6 lessons .. LOL.
More later...
My earliest memories of getting interested in pop music was around 1972 or so and mostly by A.M. radio. I remember hits like"Billy don't be a hero" Cats in the Cradle" when they were new music. It was around this time I actually bought my first cassette tape and probably what I consider to be my earliest influence into being musically driven. That artist was Jim Croce and I got it because of the song "Bad bad Leroy Brown". I must have been around 7 years of age at the time but his music even to this day really sticks with me.
In 1975 around the age of 9 my mother decided that "WE" were going to take organ lessons. I took to the keyboards with relative ease and I guess to some extent enjoyed it but it would become the foundation for my love of music and the desire to play. By 1976 I was getting pretty good at the keys and would get chosen to do public recitals for the store that we got our lessons from.. I loved the idea of playing in front of people even at that age...
At the age of 10 it is tough to get a child to do anything and I supposed to some extent I was no different. My mom would regularly have to push me to get my practice time in and I've since come to learn that if it needs to be pushed then it isn't enjoyed. Mom had started taking to secretly taping my practice time and playing it back to show me what needed to be improved upon ..it was this act that would push me clear of music for the next yr and a half....
Late in Oct 1976 a friend and I were hanging at my house watching a show on TV called the Paul Lynde Special and it wouldn't become apparent how much of an affect that show would have on me for quite some time. The show was based around a holiday Halloween special and had various skits and characters from other shows but the one thing that kicked my ass that night was my introduction to Rock and Roll.
Kiss debuted live on that show that evening in support of the Destroyer album, I was immediately blown away by the intensity of the music and the visual aspects of the band. While it wasn't right away this influenced me in a musical sense it certainly started me off as a fan. By 1977/78 Kiss had released Alive 2 and it was that album that finally pulled me into the guitar world. For Christmas that year I received my "Memphis" Strat and an Amp, I was well on my way!!
Dealing with keyboard lessons for close to 2 years gave me an idea of what I was in for or at least so I thought in taking guitar lessons. The thing I had not counted on was having to build up callouses and the pain endured learning to play. For whatever reason I was not introduced into "light" gage strings and I have to admit there were many times where it wasn't a pleasant experience.
I took all of 6 lessons that year and learned that I was terribly bored after all when are we gonna get to the good stuff...Rock and Roll .. not the fundamentals of site reading dammit... I messed with the guitar on and off with my own familiarity for a few years and finally Rhoads came into the picture.. Again I was blown away by the intensity of the music and the playing.. His playing would have a huge impact on me in years to come.
By the time I was 17 with 6 lessons under my belt and a whole lot of learning on my own I was playing locally with friends I had made in high school I'd have to say that jamming with other people, learning songs and specifically "Guitar for the practicing musician" were the things that had the biggest impact on my playing level. I had always been lucky enough even to this day to have a natural ability to play the guitar but the biggest lesson I can hand to anyone who wants to get better is to go play with people. Play with people who are better than you.. you will most certainly feel intimidated and out gunned..but the one thing that gave me was drive and knowledge.
By jamming with people above my level it gave me the chance to see more established people play and learn from it. It helped me evolve and challenge my limits.. All on 6 lessons .. LOL.
More later...
Monday, April 10, 2006
Wow, cobwebs
Seems to be a lot of dust and cobwebs in here huh .. Been a while since I've logged in and actually written something. Life has been busy and hectic for the last several weeks. So for those nice enough to stop and read or even post a comment for that matter I apologize. I have not ignored reading your blogs, I've been following them and haven't made much time for comments or opinions.. I do thoroughly enjoy reading all your blogs..
So I mentioned things being hectic, as most here would know I run an on-line forum with my buddy Sully (link to the right). A few weeks ago we undertook the effort of moving all our UBB over to a new software called VBulletin. I'm really liking the new layout of the forum and the tools that are available to us. The learning curve has been a pain in the ass and the swap has created a boatload of work as far as registrations and old membership issues. Slowly those things are getting worked out but it always amazes me how much time it consumes ..
2nd on the list of hectic is work. Apparently the bigwigs up top have admitted to dropping the ball on what our customer orders were going to be. Basically this translates into ..Hey guys we fucked up so you need to work more hours while we are golfing...So lately I have been coming into work by 6am and getting an extra hour a day. I'm not used to getting up at 5am so I must say this is wearing thin on my old body...
Guitar playing..
Man I'd been getting lazy for a while as the closest I'd get to picking up a guitar was moving it room to room in its case. The one thing that always seems to inspire me to play guitar is new equipment or toys. This weekend Line6 released the latest update to their flagship Vetta amp and I've been waiting this one with little patience. Sat the new update was released and I downloaded it and installed it right away. For those of you who either don't know what a vetta is or you are just a complete tone snob (I'll touch on that some other time) I'll explain.
A Vetta is a software driven amplifier that has "modeling" technology. Basically line6 acquired all different big time amps and recorded and analyzed their frequency and resonance curves. They designed the software to react like the original amplifier. Is it dead on tube tone? Certainly not but it definitely sounds good and eats the crap out of any solid state amplifier. The positive to this amp is that instead of being locked to one tone or several different amps you end up with a much wider range of amps to play through as well as stomp boxes and such.
The new release fixed several things that either users wanted fixed or added and the new update so far seems to be worth the wait. Anything that gets me to pull a guitar out of a case and play is a good thing isn't it? What I haven't done is spent time with one specific guitar in ages. (Sounds like part of the family huh)
Anyone who knows me can tell you that I am very dedicated to charvel superstrats as my guitar of choice, but like many guitar players I have at least one Les Paul in my arsenal. She is a 1993 Sunburst Custom that my wife had bought me for our anniversary in 94. I haven't paid much attention to that guitar in a very time other than to try a new setup in it but funny enough it ended up stock again..
Yesterday I pulled the old Paul out and fired up the new Vetta firmware and as I played I remembered what I actually loved about that Les Paul. There are specific guitar we all own or love that until we pick them up we tend to forget what it is we moss about them .. I guess it's like throwing on a well worn in pair of jeans that just seem to fit well ...
Anyway that's enough for now.. gotta get back to work .. Be cool everyone, I'm watching ..
Kev
So I mentioned things being hectic, as most here would know I run an on-line forum with my buddy Sully (link to the right). A few weeks ago we undertook the effort of moving all our UBB over to a new software called VBulletin. I'm really liking the new layout of the forum and the tools that are available to us. The learning curve has been a pain in the ass and the swap has created a boatload of work as far as registrations and old membership issues. Slowly those things are getting worked out but it always amazes me how much time it consumes ..
2nd on the list of hectic is work. Apparently the bigwigs up top have admitted to dropping the ball on what our customer orders were going to be. Basically this translates into ..Hey guys we fucked up so you need to work more hours while we are golfing...So lately I have been coming into work by 6am and getting an extra hour a day. I'm not used to getting up at 5am so I must say this is wearing thin on my old body...
Guitar playing..
Man I'd been getting lazy for a while as the closest I'd get to picking up a guitar was moving it room to room in its case. The one thing that always seems to inspire me to play guitar is new equipment or toys. This weekend Line6 released the latest update to their flagship Vetta amp and I've been waiting this one with little patience. Sat the new update was released and I downloaded it and installed it right away. For those of you who either don't know what a vetta is or you are just a complete tone snob (I'll touch on that some other time) I'll explain.
A Vetta is a software driven amplifier that has "modeling" technology. Basically line6 acquired all different big time amps and recorded and analyzed their frequency and resonance curves. They designed the software to react like the original amplifier. Is it dead on tube tone? Certainly not but it definitely sounds good and eats the crap out of any solid state amplifier. The positive to this amp is that instead of being locked to one tone or several different amps you end up with a much wider range of amps to play through as well as stomp boxes and such.
The new release fixed several things that either users wanted fixed or added and the new update so far seems to be worth the wait. Anything that gets me to pull a guitar out of a case and play is a good thing isn't it? What I haven't done is spent time with one specific guitar in ages. (Sounds like part of the family huh)
Anyone who knows me can tell you that I am very dedicated to charvel superstrats as my guitar of choice, but like many guitar players I have at least one Les Paul in my arsenal. She is a 1993 Sunburst Custom that my wife had bought me for our anniversary in 94. I haven't paid much attention to that guitar in a very time other than to try a new setup in it but funny enough it ended up stock again..
Yesterday I pulled the old Paul out and fired up the new Vetta firmware and as I played I remembered what I actually loved about that Les Paul. There are specific guitar we all own or love that until we pick them up we tend to forget what it is we moss about them .. I guess it's like throwing on a well worn in pair of jeans that just seem to fit well ...
Anyway that's enough for now.. gotta get back to work .. Be cool everyone, I'm watching ..
Kev
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
Venting time
I need to blow a friggin gasket for a sec...
What is with people and their attitudes towards kids school sales drives. When my daughter was young I used to give to everyone who asked for their school events. Candy bar sales, candle sales, calender sales what ever was asked of me by my friends.
When Jessica became of the age to have these drives everyones wallet seemed to dry up. Now I've commited to not doing it anymore because I got jaded when it was my daughters time.
A co-worker just came in selling calenders for his kids and I politely tried to decline citing no money on me. To which he was willing to extend me the credit till I could pay and again I politely declined..
This co-worker just stormed out of my room in a fit of anger because he didn't get his way. Now I'm as giving as possible to all that know me and maybe I'm a bit off base here but these things should be banned from work..all they do is create resentment.. Now he is angry at me over a lousy $5 and I'm angry at him for his tantrum......
people- Get the fuck over it, if you don't get what your after then act like an adult ..or don't bring the damn things to work...........
What is with people and their attitudes towards kids school sales drives. When my daughter was young I used to give to everyone who asked for their school events. Candy bar sales, candle sales, calender sales what ever was asked of me by my friends.
When Jessica became of the age to have these drives everyones wallet seemed to dry up. Now I've commited to not doing it anymore because I got jaded when it was my daughters time.
A co-worker just came in selling calenders for his kids and I politely tried to decline citing no money on me. To which he was willing to extend me the credit till I could pay and again I politely declined..
This co-worker just stormed out of my room in a fit of anger because he didn't get his way. Now I'm as giving as possible to all that know me and maybe I'm a bit off base here but these things should be banned from work..all they do is create resentment.. Now he is angry at me over a lousy $5 and I'm angry at him for his tantrum......
people- Get the fuck over it, if you don't get what your after then act like an adult ..or don't bring the damn things to work...........
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
Dee and Me
I'm a bit bored and I haven't blogged very much lately so I figured I would talk a bit about my boring life...
My Wife ...
What is there to say about your spouse? I mean a lot of people joke about the things their spouses are good for, or they would like to do to them.It always makes me wonder how much of that is a joke and how much is how they really feel...
So here's my disclaimer...
Diane is my best friend in the whole world and there isn't any way I could imagine her not being a part of my life. We have always been the type of couple that enjoyed each others company on varying levels. Some may think that's a bit too mushy ...so whatevah ..The fact is there is no one I enjoy being around more ...
When we get out of bed we aren't looking what we are going to do on our own, we are always looking to the other asking what do you want to do today... This isn't to say we never have a lone time but we certianly love doing most things together ...
I met Diane in the spring of 1983 shortly after I had graduated from high school. I had taken a temporary job working at Burger King (bleh) in between Machinist jobs. Diane was one of the first people I met the day I started there and neither of us were looking for a relationship as we were both involved seriously already. I was 17 and she was 18 ...
I only held that job for a short 2-3 weeks and went on my own way but every once in while I would bump into her be it going into B.K myself or at the local mall. She would always ask if I was still dating my girl and the answer was usually yes.
On one friday evening after breaking up with my girlfriend I happened to go out with another gorl from B.K and some friends when we happened into the restaurant for a quick bite and to hang out. Diane happened to be working that night and my friend Pete saw her and was very interested in her. The girl I happened to be out with knew Diane and approached her to see if she could get old Petee a date ..
She told Diane that guy over there is interested in you and want's you to call him and proceeded to hand Diane Pete's phone number.Diane made a natural assuption that this girl was pointing at me and was happy to hear this news... until she found out whose number she actually had... Old Petee never got that date..
Later that year around November Diane and I bumped itno each other at the local mall and the usual conversation started..are you still dating so and so .. But the difference this time was that we were both unattached!! Diane promptly handed me her phone number and told me to call. While this was going on her mom happened to come up behind her and Diane wanted to make a point of introducing me...
Um mom .. I'd like you to meet Steve .... STEVE!! ..... WTF ...She didn't even remember my name!! Without missing a beat I said please to meet you Mrs Hoh (I swear that's her maiden name) and my name isn't Steve ..it is Kevin. .. Diane has never been allowed to live that down to this day ... Maybe not the most romantic way to start out ..but certainly memorable .. Below is a few pictures of Diane and I when we first met and now ...
yep still together after all this time
My Wife ...
What is there to say about your spouse? I mean a lot of people joke about the things their spouses are good for, or they would like to do to them.It always makes me wonder how much of that is a joke and how much is how they really feel...
So here's my disclaimer...
Diane is my best friend in the whole world and there isn't any way I could imagine her not being a part of my life. We have always been the type of couple that enjoyed each others company on varying levels. Some may think that's a bit too mushy ...so whatevah ..The fact is there is no one I enjoy being around more ...
When we get out of bed we aren't looking what we are going to do on our own, we are always looking to the other asking what do you want to do today... This isn't to say we never have a lone time but we certianly love doing most things together ...
I met Diane in the spring of 1983 shortly after I had graduated from high school. I had taken a temporary job working at Burger King (bleh) in between Machinist jobs. Diane was one of the first people I met the day I started there and neither of us were looking for a relationship as we were both involved seriously already. I was 17 and she was 18 ...
I only held that job for a short 2-3 weeks and went on my own way but every once in while I would bump into her be it going into B.K myself or at the local mall. She would always ask if I was still dating my girl and the answer was usually yes.
On one friday evening after breaking up with my girlfriend I happened to go out with another gorl from B.K and some friends when we happened into the restaurant for a quick bite and to hang out. Diane happened to be working that night and my friend Pete saw her and was very interested in her. The girl I happened to be out with knew Diane and approached her to see if she could get old Petee a date ..
She told Diane that guy over there is interested in you and want's you to call him and proceeded to hand Diane Pete's phone number.Diane made a natural assuption that this girl was pointing at me and was happy to hear this news... until she found out whose number she actually had... Old Petee never got that date..
Later that year around November Diane and I bumped itno each other at the local mall and the usual conversation started..are you still dating so and so .. But the difference this time was that we were both unattached!! Diane promptly handed me her phone number and told me to call. While this was going on her mom happened to come up behind her and Diane wanted to make a point of introducing me...
Um mom .. I'd like you to meet Steve .... STEVE!! ..... WTF ...She didn't even remember my name!! Without missing a beat I said please to meet you Mrs Hoh (I swear that's her maiden name) and my name isn't Steve ..it is Kevin. .. Diane has never been allowed to live that down to this day ... Maybe not the most romantic way to start out ..but certainly memorable .. Below is a few pictures of Diane and I when we first met and now ...
yep still together after all this time
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
Whoa ,,,been a long time!
Seems like forever since I had anything to write or I guess the time to write it..that and I'm just really lazy at times with creativity.
A week and a half ago Diane and I had the pleasure of seeing Paul Rodgers and Queen in concert. I had to admit when I first heard they were touring together I couldn't imagine Paul stepping into Freddies shoes, boy was I off base.
While he would never be able to replace Freddie he certainly fit the bill and did all the songs justice. They did a wide arrangement of hits from Queen, Paul, Bad Co and Free and it was a rocking 2+ hour show.
The highlight was for the song Bohemian Rhapsody in which they used concert footage of Freddie live and played along with the video. It was a heartfelt ftting tribute to the memory of Freddie and Queen.
At the end of the show for the Encore the most astounding thing happened that caused Queen to play the Encore out of sync. After leaving the stage the crowd erupted in the foot/clap beat that rings proud for We Will Rock you and they had the timing down perfectly. When Queen re-emerged Roger Taylor picked up on the drums right where the crowd was keeping a beat. It was awesome to hear and be a part of. Normally they would transition into We are the champions but because it weas done in this manner they actually went back to do All Right now before finishing the night with Champions...
All in all it was an awesome experience and if you like either band go see the show ..
On a side note ..
Happenings..
I broke down a bought a 25th anniversary Charvel and I'm so pleased with this guitar. It is a one off from the released series and is the only Red one ever built. The guitar is everything I had hoped it would be. After getting it I had a friend who is an old Ibanez player check it out and he was in such awe of it he ended up buying his own which I helped him aquire through a friend "hippie Tim" from the JCF... (Thanks Tim!)
Sully~ He's finally a homeowner!! Congrats dude, it's been a long road for ya but it's great to see lifes puzzle falling into place for ya. Good things are in your future..
Annah~ I happened to notice on Annah's site about the HRC event she attended and wanted to make it a point to have people support this. We all need to get along and care about each other on this crazy planet and this is just another step in harmony. I am of the beleif that ignorance only keeps us uncivilized and uncaring.... Keep on learning and rocking...support it ..
http://www.hrc.org/
On another note Annah is almost done with her book and I for one am looking forward to reading it, she seems to be moving right along ...keep up the good work!!!
As far as me? More to come I guess but for now my lunch break is over dammit!
A week and a half ago Diane and I had the pleasure of seeing Paul Rodgers and Queen in concert. I had to admit when I first heard they were touring together I couldn't imagine Paul stepping into Freddies shoes, boy was I off base.
While he would never be able to replace Freddie he certainly fit the bill and did all the songs justice. They did a wide arrangement of hits from Queen, Paul, Bad Co and Free and it was a rocking 2+ hour show.
The highlight was for the song Bohemian Rhapsody in which they used concert footage of Freddie live and played along with the video. It was a heartfelt ftting tribute to the memory of Freddie and Queen.
At the end of the show for the Encore the most astounding thing happened that caused Queen to play the Encore out of sync. After leaving the stage the crowd erupted in the foot/clap beat that rings proud for We Will Rock you and they had the timing down perfectly. When Queen re-emerged Roger Taylor picked up on the drums right where the crowd was keeping a beat. It was awesome to hear and be a part of. Normally they would transition into We are the champions but because it weas done in this manner they actually went back to do All Right now before finishing the night with Champions...
All in all it was an awesome experience and if you like either band go see the show ..
On a side note ..
Happenings..
I broke down a bought a 25th anniversary Charvel and I'm so pleased with this guitar. It is a one off from the released series and is the only Red one ever built. The guitar is everything I had hoped it would be. After getting it I had a friend who is an old Ibanez player check it out and he was in such awe of it he ended up buying his own which I helped him aquire through a friend "hippie Tim" from the JCF... (Thanks Tim!)
Sully~ He's finally a homeowner!! Congrats dude, it's been a long road for ya but it's great to see lifes puzzle falling into place for ya. Good things are in your future..
Annah~ I happened to notice on Annah's site about the HRC event she attended and wanted to make it a point to have people support this. We all need to get along and care about each other on this crazy planet and this is just another step in harmony. I am of the beleif that ignorance only keeps us uncivilized and uncaring.... Keep on learning and rocking...support it ..
http://www.hrc.org/
On another note Annah is almost done with her book and I for one am looking forward to reading it, she seems to be moving right along ...keep up the good work!!!
As far as me? More to come I guess but for now my lunch break is over dammit!
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Keeping up with the joneses .. or at least 1
Ok ..Em loves these little quizzes and loves to post the results on her blog ..and she gets me everytime I go there to see what I get ..
So here ya go Em guess we could hang together....
So here ya go Em guess we could hang together....
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